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Dramas-Skits
Dramas-Skits Boasting in the Lord Skit
Tuesday, March 31, 2009 at 11:19AM
Boasting in the Lord
(three people sitting at table -- on table is sign reading "Boasters & Braggarts Anonymous" -- there is also a fourth, empty chair)
MS. BUCKS:
(riffling through stacks of money) Aside from taxes, the financial world is the place to be. My investments in land and T-bills are paying off in high dividends. (holds up a fistful of dollars) And I am doing (coughs politely) quite well, thank you.
MR. BRAINS:
(surrounded by books) I’ve got two doctorates, and I won’t even mention my Masters or Bachelors or even my Associates -- I’m a Rhodes Scholar, not that it is all that important. I can assure you, NOW is the time to hit the books! (taps a book against his head knowingly)
MR. MUSCLES:
(using a collection of handgrips and arm exercise equipment) Last week I won a national arm-wrestling championship, and I’ve got better than a good shot of making it onto the Olympic powerlifting team in 2000. I’ve mastered the true secret of life. (flexes his biceps mightily)
MS. BUCKS:
My friends, if you want to please God -- I think we can all agree that "pleasing God" is important -- you need to start investing your money. When you stop to think about it, MOST of Jesus’ sayings and parables were about money. The "Widow’s Mite," the "Wages at the End of the Day," and of course, my personal favorite: "The Investment of the Talents." (waves money with emphasis) Invest your moolah wisely, and please God. Stewardship, stewardship, stewardship!
MR. BRAINS:
Do you know how absurd you sound? Well, with your education, I assume you don’t know how absurd you sound. Please God with money? Forget money. Knowledge, wisdom -- EDUCATION is the answer. EDUCATION is the key to success, the key to happiness --money cannot buy wisdom. In fact the Bible is quite clear: "Study to show thyself approved." (shakes book threateningly)
MR. MUSCLES:
You BOTH have missed the point. God doesn’t care so much about money or education. What God cares about is STRENGTH. After all, "the BODY is the temple of God." Strength is what is going to help you in practical things -- people respect a man of might. And strength is the thing to help you in spiritual things, as you need strength to defeat the enemy! I know, better than anyone, EXACTLY what the Apostle Paul was talking about when he said: "Fight the good fight."
MS. BUCKS:
Face it, money is most important, because you need lots of it to get your education AND your strength. My accountants and personal trainers told me so!
MR. BRAINS:
Education is best -- neither of you two could have achieved what you have achieved, without first obtaining your rudimentary education. Now, advance! Increase in wisdom!
MR. MUSCLES:
I could benchpress both of you -- one in each hand. If you don’t have strength, someone’s going to come along and take YOUR money -- and YOUR education isn’t going to help one bit.
MR. BRAINS:
My education includes a black belt in karate, so you better be careful with your benchpressing.
MS. BUCKS:
My bodyguards and security men are paid quite well, thank you!
MR. FAITH:
(arriving with Bible in hands) Hey everyone! Sorry I’m late. (sits down with Bible on table) I was helping out with a youth group over at the church. I’ve been real busy lately, so I haven’t had much chance to attend this group meeting.
MS. BUCKS:
(tapping watch) Time IS money, you know. But spit it out, let’s hear some bragging.
MR. BRAINS:
(demanding) What university did you attend? Post-graduate studies?
MR. MUSCLES:
(demanding) Before you answer that, what weight class are you?
MS. BUCKS:
(demanding) Hold on, hold on -- are you into long- or short-term investments?
MR. FAITH:
(looking from face to face) Oh. Well . . . let me kind of answer all of you -- or at least TRY to answer each of you, point by point.
First of all, I think money is important, but not all THAT important (shocked gasp from Ms. Bucks) -- and, to be honest, I don’t have a lot of money.
MS. BUCKS:
You don’t have a lot of money. Well, I guess it’s obvious why you don’t think it’s important!
MR. MUSCLES:
Let the man speak. He makes good sense -- and he looks to be in pretty good shape.
MR. FAITH:
As far as strength goes, I think it is important for us to be healthy. I get exercise, fresh water and fresh air, and I eat a healthy diet. But strength and health is only a small part.
MR. MUSCLES:
Ridiculous. It’s the MOST important. Without a sound body, you can’t have a sound mind! Without a strong body and strong mind, you can kiss your money good-bye -- study THAT.
MR. BRAINS:
Please! The man has wisdom, don’t quash his thoughts. Please, speak up!
MR. FAITH:
I think education is important, just like money and strength, but again, it is just a small slice of the pie. I have my high school diploma, and some college, but beyond that, worldly education is only so important, as far as eternity is concerned.
MR. BRAINS:
Oh boy, this IS the end of the world -- exactly what I’d expect an uneducated person to say!
MS. BUCKS:
Well, you’ve trashed the things that we believe important! What do YOU have to brag about?
MR. MUSCLES:
Yeah, so far I haven’t heard ANY boasting outta your corner.
MR. FAITH:
Money belongs to the Lord, I am His steward. And education, apart from God, is worthless. And all the strength in the world won’t bring you any closer to God…
MR. MUSCLES / MS. BUCKS / MR. BRAINS:
(simultaneously, in confused, heated anger) There he goes again. Strength! What’s he got to offer? Sounds like a loser to me! Wisdom! Nothing new out of his corner! Wealth! So wise, so strong, so rich! He’s wrong, pure and simple! He needs to hit the books a bit more! Show me the money, come on, show me the money!
MR. FAITH:
(waits a few moments, closing his eyes, finally raises hands for silence, but they keep up their angry babble, until finally MR. FAITH breaks in loudly) I THINK WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT, IS A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD!
(heavy silence -- the three stare incredulously at MR. FAITH)
(after a long moment) Sorry about that. I said (more subdued, taking a deep breath, quietly), I think what is most important is a relationship with God.
I fully believe, in my heart, that studying this (lifting up Bible) reveals God to me. I get to know Him. And throughout the day, I talk to Him. I tell Him about everything. I praise Him, and I thank Him, and He gives me everything. He provides for me. He meets all my needs.
And, as simple as that, I know God. But why don’t we ask Him, because here He comes now…!
MR. MUSCLES / MS. BUCKS / MR. BRAINS:
(shocked, half raising from their chairs -- freeze halfway, eyes huge, mouths dropping open -- they finally realize IT REALLY IS GOD! AND THEY DON’T KNOW HIM! Immediately they plop into their chairs, lowering their faces in shame -- only MR. FAITH is able to look at God, and smile)
THE LORD:
(arriving, smiling, loving all the members of the "Boasters & Braggarts Anonymous" club EQUALLY) I’m so happy to meet with you, My children, today. I love all of you, and long for you to know Me, to spend time with Me, to love Me.
(pausing behind MS. BUCKS’ chair) I am the Master and Creator of the Universe, and all the wealth of the cosmos is at my fingertips. (gently) Your wealth is meaningless. Know Me.
(pausing behind MR. BRAINS’ chair) I have all wisdom, and give wisdom, in full measure. The Holy Spirit desires to live inside you, begs to teach you, and lead you into all truth. (gently) Your earthly wisdom is meaningless. Know . . . Me.
(pausing behind MR. MUSCLES’ chair) My Spirit filled Samson to overflowing, and he was stronger than a thousand fierce warriors. (gently) Your strength is meaningless. Know Me.
THE LORD (CONTINUED):
(comes to rest behind MR. FAITH’s chair) Would you like to make Me happy?
MR. BRAINS / MS. BUCKS / MR. MUSCLES:
(half-raise their heads with hope) (speaking simultaneously with sincerity) Yes Lord! Oh yes! Please! YES! Tell us how! Yes Lord!
THE LORD:
(placing hands upon MR. FAITH’s shoulders) I stand for kindness, justice and righteousness on earth. I delight in these things. If you must boast, or brag, or speak loudly, then please feel free to brag about this: that you know Me . . . that you understand Me -- that you stand for the same things that I stand for: kindness, justice, and righteousness.
MS. BUCKS / MR. BRAINS / MR. FAITH / MR. MUSCLES:
(all equally happy, equally enthused, equally inspired) Yes, Lord!
THE LORD:
NOW you have the secret! So . . . members of "Boasters & Braggarts Anonymous" -- I officially declare this meeting adjourned! (exiting) Know the sound of my voice! Come! And follow Me!
(the members of "Boasters & Braggarts Anonymous" follow the LORD)
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