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If It Quacks Like A Chicken   No furnishings or equipment is required. It works best if you have a door where the boy or girl can come in and go out during the play. If no door is available, try mime to suggest one or use a screen or cardboard shield. The group should "over act" for comedy. Each time the Actor 1 turns to leave, the group makes faces, sticking out tongues, wiggling fingers in ears, and waving their hands. Cast: Actor 1 Actor 2 (spokesman for the group) 2 or more people to be the rest of the group Scene 1   Group gets in a huddle and whispers like they are making plans. They nod "yes", congratulate each other and spread out, acting like chickens. (flap wings, make head bob, etc.) Actor 1 walks in through door and looks at them. Actor1: What are you doing? Actor 2 - Can't you see, we're chickens Actor 1: Oh, so you have feathers? (they look at their arms, legs, etc, & then shake heads "no") Actor 1: and you lay eggs? (they look behind themselves and each other and then shake heads "no") Actor 1: I didn't think so, just acting like a chicken does not make you one. (As Actor 1 walks out, they make faces at him/her) Scene 2   Group huddles, comes out acting like Ninjas Actor 1: What is it this time? Actor 2: Can't you see, we're Ninja, Karate people Actor 1: You guys are wierd! Ok, you think you are martial arts experts, anyone want to break a board with your head? (look at each other and shake heads "no") Actor 1: How about belts, do any of you have a martial arts belt? (look at their waists and then shake heads "no") Actor 1: You can't become a Ninja, Karate expert just by walking around like one. Get real! (make faces as he walks out) Scene 3   Group huddles, comes out acting like Ballerinas Actor 1: Let me guess, you are walking on the eggs you laid when you were chickens Actor 2: We are ballerinas Actor 1: I don't hear any music, do you? (they cup their ears, listen and shake their heads) Actor 1: And what about those clothes, I don't see any tutus (they look down, at each other and then shake heads "no") Actor 1: get it straight this time! You can't be a chicken or a ninja or a ballerina just because you try to act like one. You need to practice for years to become a martial arts expert or a ballerina. And chickens are, well, they are just born chickens Scene 4   Group huddles, lines up across the front, drops to knees and "acts religions" (say "Amen", "Hallelujah", pass an offering plate, pretend to pray, etc.) Actor 1: What is it this time? Actor 2: Amen, hallelujah, praise God, Sister (or Brother). we're religious people Actor 1: You mean you are Christians? Actor 2: Yeah, well, whatever. I don't know about that stuff. I just know we've got religion. Actor 1: Do you think this is going to get you to heaven? (they look at each other, shrug, look at her and shake their heads "yes") Actor 2: Sure hope so! Actor 1: Do you have Jesus living in your hearts? (they look at her confused and shrug) Actor 1: Have you been born again? (they look at her confused and shrug, again) Actor 2: Look, we're praying aren't we, give me a break! Actor 1: Whether or not I give you a break does not matter. What matters is this. Jesus said, "Not everyone who calls me Lord, Lord will enter into the Kingdom of Heaven but only he who does my Father's will." (all look really confused) Actor 2: Huh? Actor 1 or someone else: (explain that salvation comes through Jesus, not through our works)